University of Tennessee at Chattanooga

More Tarnish You Can Sing To:

Pardon me boy…is that the Chattanooga football team?

Yes! Yes! Cell 29!

Boy you can give me a shine!

Yes, UTC is high on the charts with this hit single, just as their Clemson counterparts are. After starting the season unranked in the Tarnished Twenty, UTC worked themselves into a spot among the nation's Tarnished Elite.

The UTC football team is going to need some shoe polish to rid itself of a highly concentrated amount of law-breaking this football season. It seems that late September and early October became an irresistible isle of mayhem for the UTC gridders.

Their record: 3 football players, 3 guilty pleas of assault, all in less than one week. If UTC could engineer an offense to match how they rack up offenses, they'd be playing for the National Title come January.

In the first affair, defensive backs Marcus Ellerbe and Temus Terry assaulted a former teammate (HINT: Boys, try out for the team at Georgia Tech. They'll LOVE you there…) at a party after the former teammate "stared at them." Then there was linebacker Joshua Cain who, after a night of boozing, struck Jonathan Wooten several times at a local nightclub. As part of his plea, Cain must submit to drug and alcohol screening. In addition, he has to work in a local soup kitchen.

Yes, congrats are due to UT-Chattanooga. Keep up the behavior, UTC-maybe you can run with the big bad boys again in 2001!

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